Evelyn is currently a woman's counselor in the religious circle. Her area of expertise for the past 10 years is to teach women how to balance life from a spiritual standpoint.
MICHAEL STOLLER
A Falling Awake Certified Coach, Michael is also an experienced consultant and trainer working predominantly with men and couples.
SUSAN LERNER
My approach to relationships is for each person to understand and appreciate their own needs and those of their partner(s).
Find a Relationship Development Coach
Find a Relationship Development Coach to assist you in all aspects of improuving your relationship. Hundreds of Coaches Worldwide. Coaching In Person or Via Phone.
Single Mother By Choice By Coaching Circles Staff Writer
Comments (0)
"Someday you'll meet someone, fall in love, get married and have children." Sound familiar? But what our mothers didn't tell us was that it doesn't necessarily have to be in that order.
"For me, the time for the whole marriage and children thing just never lined up," says Kirsten, 36, an investment banker in New York City. "I was too busy building my career in my twenties. The men I met were busy with their careers too and not serious about relationships. I kept thinking it would just 'happen,' that it would all fall into place and it wasn't until I was celebrating my 35th birthday, that I realized the whole procreation scene was not adding up for me . I was not in a relationship and even if I did meet someone, it would take some time for things to develop. For me it was a time issue. I had the money but I was running out of time."
That's when Kirsten got out her calendar and took the matter of family planning in her own hands. She checked out the viability of her remaining eggs, researched sperm donors, scheduled an artificial insemination procedure and within a few months she was pregnant. Time was no longer the issue for Kirsten.
More and more single women of a certain age are choosing to heed the alarms of the biological clock . The Census Bureau reports that 40 percent of never-married women in their 30s have a child. And single motherhood for both divorced and never-married women continues to rise. In 1970 there were 3.4 million single mothers in the United States; now there are nearly 10 million.
Although this population is on the rise and the social stigma once associated with single parenthood seems to be fading, advocates for marriage and the family express concern for the child. "It's not the social stigma of single parenthood that worries me," says Tian Dayton, Ph.D., author of Heartwounds and Trauma and Addiction, "it's that the richness and depth of the child's outer life - the longevity and commitment of parental relationships - translate into a more solid inner world for a growing child." While Barbara Curry, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Charleston, South Carolina, may agree with the importance of a family structure for the development of a child, she also supports the decision of women in their thirties choosing to have children on their own. "Fertility starts to decrease after a woman is 35 and further reduces to a 30% chance of becoming pregnant after she is forty. This is not a fact that well educated, single women take lightly," says Barbara.
Deborah Wolf, a psychotherapist in New York City, says of her clients deciding to be single mothers, "These women have more wisdom and self knowledge by this age. They actually want a child, have done their homework and are in an emotionally good place to mother." She goes on to say that these women have developed strong extended family networks and systems of support. However both therapists stress the importance of examining the choice to have a child alone.
Ask yourself these questions if you're deciding to have a child on your own.
These are based on questions from “The Complete Single Mother” by Andrea Engber and Leah Klunger, PhD:
• How will the father play a role in your child's life?
• Do you have an extended family in place that can support you and your choice?
• Are you emotionally prepared to be judged by others and to handle negative feedback?
• Do you think having a child will fill a void in your own life?
• Are you able to mother yourself when you need to?
• How will you explain your choice to become a single mother to your child?
• Are you having a child so a relationship can continue?
• Are you prepared for the physical and emotional stress of pregnancy?
• Do you have all of your legal and financial matters in order?
Long Distance Relationships By Andre Cross via AskMen.com Women: can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em. This common expression relates well to the problematic issue of long distance relationships, because when your relationship is put to through this particular test, its time to decide which of these opposing statements applies to you the most…
Does Divorce Make People Happy? Findings from a Study of Unhappy Marriages By Linda J. Waite, Don Browning, William J. Dohert Call it the "divorce assumption." Most people assume that a person stuck in a bad marriage has two choices: stay married and miserable or get a divorce and become happier. But now come the findings from the first scholarly study ever to test that assumption, and these findings challenge conventional wisdom.
“The Prophet” by Kahlil Gibran
Then Almitra spoke again and said,
And what of Marriage, master?
And he answered saying:
You were born together, and together you shall be for ever more.
You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days.
Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness.
And let the winds of heaven dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same
music. Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together.
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.
free
“What Makes Kids Care?: Teaching Gentleness in a Violent World” by APA
In a world where violence and cruelty seem to be common and almost acceptable, many parents wonder what they can do to help their children to become kinder and gentler--to develop a sense of caring and compassion for others. free
You and I
Have so much love
That it
Burns like a fire,
In which we bake a lump of clay
Molded into a figure of you
And a figure of me.
Then we take both of them,
And break them into pieces,
And mix the pieces with water,
And mold again a figure of you,
And a figure of me.
I am in your clay.
You are in my clay.
In life we share a single quilt.
In death we will share one bed. free
“Communication Tips for Parents” by APA
- Be available for your children
- Let your kids know you're listening
- Respond in a way your children will hear
- Parenting is hard work (and much more) free
“The Five Factors for a Phenomenal Family” by Dr. Phil
Starting right now, you can begin to make choices and take day-to-day actions that will create nothing short of a phenomenal family. free
A Good Guide to LGBT Home Ownership
A comprehensive guide explaining the different approaches same-sex couples and other partnered couples can take in getting a mortgage, establishing ownership of a home and other legal issues.
Click: The Magic of Instant Connections
BOOK There is that special moment when two people click, rather than simply meet. The Brafman brothers draw on a variety of sources to find the facts behind instant connections.
How: Why How We Do Anything Means Everything...in Business
*JUST RELEASED* "It is without question the single most interesting and thought provoking book I have read in a long time." ~ Murray Hidary, iAmplify
Single Mother By Choice By Coaching Circles Staff Writer
Long Distance Relationships By Andre Cross via AskMen.com 
Does Divorce Make People Happy?
